NEXT!

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GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not pregnant. So very not pregnant.

All right. ALL RIGHT.

You know what? You know all that stuff about [insert simpering internal tone of voice here] "being more likely to conceive in the three months following an HSG, since it clears out the tubes"?

You know all that earlier chat about how [insert quavering indecision here] "It'll be good to wait a few more months anyway, since I'm just not sure I'm ready to leap into ART".

Well, guess what. I am OVER IT. I am so over it, and ready to move on. Bring me some fucking fertility drugs, stat.

Oh, and while I am waiting for those fucking drugs, I must have some booze.

Yes. I demand to have some booze.