The Wizard Revealed

"Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain"

-The Wizard of Oz

Antral follicles! Aha! Thank you, Amanda for that tip. I believe now that the little follicles seen on the last ultrasound were indeed antral follicles. Though now I know what they are, I am worried that we didn't see more. I am comforting myself with the thought that La Nurse didn't really spend a lot of time focusing on what was there. Perhaps she is not too up on all things antral, and may not have counted properly.

Meanwhile, it's Day 3 of stims! Stimmity stims with the jaunty pen!

Perhaps the best way I can describe my current feelings on the whole injection thing is to say that Oz the Great and Terrible has proved less than great and less than terrible after all. After two years of tripping down the Yellow Brick road, fearing and dreading my arrival in the ART City, knowing that the day would come when I would have to give myself a shot, it's something of a revelation to pull the curtain aside to discover that what scared me the most was the idea of Oz.

OK, I do confess the first one was a wee bit fraught. But in part that may have been due to the fact that E. took it upon himself right at that particular juncture to form a keen interest in all things IVF. I was cleaning the bathroom and unpacking the pen kit in preparation when he wandered in.

"Want help?" he chirped.

"No, not right now, thanks," I said, washing my hands.

He leaned against the bathroom door, arms crossed

"But I want to participate! I want to know what is going on. I want to be part of the proooooocesss!" he said.

Huh. This was all news to me, considering he has thus far attended almost none of the appointments, has no idea of what drugs I am taking, and wouldn't know his ass from an antral. But I decided to humor him. Because I am nice that way.

"Let's read the instructions to-gether!" he said gaily.

Oh, you mean the instructions that I have already read about eight thousand times, to the point where the words are practically tattooed on my retinas? Sure thing, chicken wing.

"Photo A," he recited, "Remove. The. Pen. Cap."

"Yup, done, moving right along."

"Photo B, take the needle and remove the peel tab from the outer needle cap," he intoned.

"Yes, already done. Let's move it along."

And so it went. By the time he had reached Photo D, I had already primed the pen, dialed the dose and iced my stomach. All I wanted to do was get on with the injecting before I completely lost my nerve.

"Photo E," he droned.

"Sweetie," I interrupted. "I need to do this RIGHT NOW before I freak out completely. Go away. I will call you when it is done."

So he went and waited outside. I looked at the needle, whimpered, and paused.

"Do you want me to do it?" he shouted through the door.

"No," I called, "I have to do this now or I will never be able to do it."

And with that, I stuck the needle in. Hey presto. Like a knife into blubber. No pain, no bruising, no problemo! I only have to do it once a day, which relatively speaking is a plus, but even so- what a revelation!

I am sure the Wanded- er, I mean Winged- Monkeys would be very proud.

Comments

[Pamplemousse]

Haha! I bet you are wondering what all the whinging that goes on is all about, right? Congrats on becoming a shots supremo!

[Cathy]

Congratulations! You are a braver soul than me, but I did eventually master the shots. What a feeling of accomplishment that was! (An empowering moment on the yellow brick IVF road.) Welcome to ART City, and I wish you success (and no wicked witches of the wand).

[Jen]

I don't know if the monkeys would be proud, but I sure am!

I find the shots to be proof that really, we are capable of doing so much more than ever seemed possible.

And I am glad that E took an interest (albeit ill-timed) in this process. Hopefully that's a good omen for things to come, and not just an indication that he's interested in the idea of you jabbing sharp things in your body.

[Toni]

The first cycle that I did Gonal F - my hubby did the shots. And then he couldn't be there...and I had to do it myself. And realized that it didn't hurt as much :) You can involve him by drawing what they looked like - or making him draw circles the size of what size your follies are. Or have the wand monkey take pictures of the follies so he can see them.

And then make him be there for the big appointments. Beyond that, it's like dragging a cat to a bath.

[ManhattanAnne]

Congrats! Hey, having pierced the "blubber," maybe you can use the used needle to make scrimshaw-- how else is a castaway whaler supposed to pass time waiting to get off the island?

[Panda]

You totally rock. Nerves of steel! I'm sure the jaunty nature of your pen put you right at ease.

[Menita]

Giggling over here at E's stab (pun intended) at participation.
Very, very proud of you.

[Amanda]

No problemo. Congrats on surviving the first shot! The first one is always the hardest. I'm sure you'll be a pro in no time flat. Oh, and about the antrals. It's a good sign to see them, but it doesn't mean that's the number of eggs you'll end up retrieving. I'll bet you have a bunch more follicles pop up.

[Brenda]

The first one is the hardest.

Definitely one of the funniest posts I've seen on such subject. Now if you can just get those flying monkeys to fly out your antral you'll be okay.

[OvaGirl]

Well done Mare and I'll be skipping (in a jaunty fashion of course) up that yellow brick path in your footsteps very very soon. See you in the Emerald City.

[Thalia]

Hoping those stimms are wending their way through the bloodstream as we type, stimming away. You've inspired hope in me re injecting myself! Thanks

[Julie]

I was the same way on my first shot (no pen - just the needle). I discovered that directly below the belly button = no pain. If you go a little too far from that point, you will feel it. Not that it hurts - it really doesn't - you can just feel it where below the belly button you don't.

[Suz]

I love this post! You're right, it doesn't hurt as much as you think it will.

[Cat]

It's good to hear that it's not as bad as we imagine. I'm right behind you on the needle sticking and really appreciate the full report and laugh. Congrats.

[Lala]

Well done lady!

[susie]

Congrats! I'm glad it went well. And I agree, it's not so bad, I like giving myself the shots way better than having my husband do it (OW).

Good luck!

[Emily]

I hear Judy Garland in the background now...

Thinking of you.

[LEB]

yay to be moving forward!

I won't let my dh anywhere near me with a needle (my mum does my trigger shot). He can be involved by pandering to my hormonal whims ;)

[InSpring]

Oh you never forget that first time... Now you're a woman mare...