Shadow puppets

Oh my friends, do you know how cute and amusing you all are? Your reaction to the word "secret" is very endearing indeed.

"Secret!" you gasp, bouncing gently in your seats, waving your tiny paws in the air. "She said secret! What could it be? What oh what?" And I imagine you conjuring up all sorts of delicious possibilities. Cotton candy! A box of puppies! A positive peestick! The explanation of what is going on in that hatch on Lost!

Sadly, I fear it is none of those things. I hate to dampen such sweet and uplifting enthusiasm, but in fact, the secret is nothing nice at all- quite the opposite. I was not mentioning it to tease as much as I was trying to allude to the fact that all is not completely well here, but I can't- and won't- go into the specifics right now.

Let's just say I have looked up from the path to find that somehow I have wandered into a very, very dark and scary part of the island. I expect to be stumbling around in the blackness for awhile (literally, since the power in my building keeps cutting out for no apparent reason, causing me to scramble for candles).

Perhaps to ward off the darkness, we could all hold hands; maybe sing a few Cheering and Rambunctious tunes. Perhaps although things keep getting worse and worse, we could dream of something better. Not to go all Julie Andrews on you, but it would comfort me if you could tell me something nice. Tell me three things that make you happy- little and inconsequential things or grand and awe-inspiring.

I'll be over here, striking a match, and trying to remember how to make a shadow puppet.

Comments

[Lori]

Well, I guess I'll start:
1. Charleston Chews - I just picked up the halloween candy and made sure it included a bag of mini charleston chews. My fave.
2. A cup of tea - nothing is more comforting that a steamy cup of tea. I think I'll put the kettle on now that I think of it.
3. Buying presents for friend and family and picking out something that's just right and will make them smile.
I thought I'd start small since I'm a little sad today myself.
I'm sorry to hear it's not a secret of the fun and exciting variety. Thinking of you and humming "Kumbaya" (however you spell it) under my breath.

[jane]

am sorry it is not a happy secret. know that complete strangers are holding your hand and humming kumbaya for you. you bring so many smiles and honesty and healing I will sing the words when you forget them.

[Manuela]

I'm so distracted by my worry for you that it's kinda hard to fulfill your request... but um... if it's the only thing that we can do for you right now... well... here goes.

Ummm... well... waking up at three or four in the morning to find that I'm holding hands with Attila, with one little kitty curled under my chin so I can feel his sweet little kitty breath on my neck, a second kitty curled up in a ball above my head so that it appears I'm wearing some atrocity of feline millinery upon my noggin that would send P.E.T.A into a righteous uproar, and a my crazy little African dog wrapped around my ankels like a pretzel.

Might sound like mayhem to many... but that's life at it's finest for me... surrounded by contented happy animals and holding hands with my dude.

[Lindy]

I know a lot of good girl scout camps songs!

And as for my three things (silly and inconsequential, because I'm not in the mood for awe-inspiring right now), not that I'm sure it'll help:

1) Bad reality TV; specifically, the fact that just when I thought I couldn't last another day without new episodes of Britney and Kevin: Chaotic, Madonna comes out with a perfectly wretched little documentary for me to watch on MTV.

2) the fact that they've finally perfected the recipie for chocolate cookie dough in a tube so that it now makes cookies that are exactly to my liking.

3) The sweet smell of bleach after my husband cleans the toilets without any prompting. I have an odd (well, not at all odd, now that I think about it) aversion to this particular chore and so we have an unspoken arrangement that if the toilets are going to be cleaned, he is going to have to do it.

[MsPrufrock]

I'm sorry to hear this secret you are harbouring is not of the good variety. I have been feeling rather low myself lately...the kind that you cannot put into words what the problem(s) is/are, but they are there.

So, as I have been trying to think of things that make me blissfully happy in their simplicity, this is a convenient time to share.

a) On my walk to work there is a path through the Common whose entire length is framed by trees blown into an arch over time due to the winds from the sea. On a quiet morning with a bit of fog and an overcast sky it is absolute perfection.

b) A cup of hot coffee, sipped whilst curled up on my cosy sofa, watching episode upon episode of Sex and the City, on a cold and rainy day. That's more than one thing, but it's the experience as a whole I'm referring to.

c) Phoning my brother 4000 miles away just to leave inside joke-type messages on the answering machine at 7am. My last one was a chicken noise made by a character on Arrested Development. Sure, it's lost on everyone else, but my husband get really excited at the prospect of doing things like this.

Don't count on me joining in on the shadow puppet game. I was always crap at them.

[susie]

I, too, am sorry that the secret isn't a happy one.

My three things:

1. Cheese
2. Italy
3. My cat

Thinking of you.

[deannavs]

I'm so sorry your secret is a dark something that is painful to think on. I was hoping with everyone that it was something wonderful. Take good care as you make your way through and maybe think on these 3 things:

1. using dog-tummies as pillows
2. a big latte with caramel, hazelut and honey (in a real mug)
3. re-reading "Cold Mountain" for hours on the couch with a big blanket and a quiet house

Wishing you well.....

[DD]

Well, Mare, that friggin' sucks.

Hope you find your list of 3 things that can ease your heart. Here are mine:

1. Going to bed after I have put on clean bedding straight from the dryer.

2. Taking long, hot showers that are not preludes to getting ready to go somewhere.

3. 20 oz. white chocolate mocha with shot of rasperry, whipcream and topped with a chocolate covered coffee-bean...

[Suz]

Mare...I'm so sorry. Here are my three:

1) Coming in the door and having our dog bounce up to me, wiggling so much with happiness that we call her "google head."

2) The leave-falling, crisp fall smell in the air.

3) When George says things like "you're my doll-baby" and then adds "....like Chucky"

[Pamplemousse]

Hmmm. Let's see. Always, always my bed with loads of pillows and that newly-washed smell. My new black linen coat with fabulous embroidery round the cuffs and hem that makes me feel all Julie Christie in Dr Zhivago even though I am not blond, not tall and not skinny! Sainsbury's onion, garlic and poppyseed bagels. You knew I would have to get food in there somewhere.

Take care, sweetie.

[jude]

Hi Mare,

I havent commented much but i often visit here. I'm sorry about your unhappy secret. You've happiness question has given me something to think about because having kids would have filled the top three answers. Now, i'm still trying to figure out the answers without relying on that. What a handicap!

I will say, my kitties make me really happy, sleeping with me or meowing at me. I lub them. Also love baking ... in a clean kitchen (which is next to NEVER!). I had to fire my cleaning lady, for jobs badly done, and she said, you know what you need ... "a maid!" Ya think?

The final thing that makes me happy is chocolate and/or dh. It's either the same thing to me or a tie :)

Take care, Jude

[Raia]

Coming off of lurker status to add my nickel. I, too, am sad that the secret is not joyful. Let's see....what makes me happy?

1) When I absolutely cannot get out of the bed in the morning, and DH makes me my coffee or tea exactly the way I like it, brings it to me in the bed, and gently folds my hands around the warm mug. Then he sits beside me in the bed just in case I'm gonna fall back asleep while still holding the beverage.

2) When I wake up in the middle of the night and I can hear DH and the dog snoring. One cadence goes up, while the other goes down. Somehow, it's totally comforting to hear my 2 fave.....beings?....comfortably sawing away....the rhythm can send me right back to sleep, too.

3) Loooooong afternoon naps.

I know, it's all about sleeping, but my bed is one of my favorite places to be. I love being wrapped in that cocoon of warmth and security.

I'm hoping you find yourself a cocoon of peace & happiness soon....

[Molly]

Crap Mare -- be careful in that part of the island. Watch out for the Others.

Things that make me happy:

1) Dove Dark Chocolate
2) Waking up and looking at the clock and realizing that I have 3 hours left before my alarm goes off
3) Cuddling under a blanket and watching the BBC "Pride and Prejudice" miniseries. Or "Anne of Green Gables." They're both like comfort food.

Wishing you good things.

[jlp]

Three things, eh? From off the top of my head:

1. My cat just returned to my lap (albeit not immediately) after I annoyed her by pulling eyesnot out of her eyes.

2. Turns out that 31% was only one standard deviation below the mean of the midterm, and thus, might still be a passing grade.

3. Tonight we fall back an hour (I think). Darker earlier is no good, but not having to wake up in pitch black will be great.

[Lisa P.]

Yikes, I'm watching Lost reruns on DVD right now and really hoping that your secret doesn't involve any numbers.

Happy is a tough place for me to find right now, but I'll give it a shot:

1) Spending time with my husband at the ocean, no matter what time of year.

2) A nice dry red wine.

3) Baking cookies with my mom. Damn, that makes me happy and sad at the same time, so perhaps that doesn't count. I could always repeat option #2...

Hope it gets better, Mare.

[getupgrrl]

(1) Cheese of all kinds.

(2) Zingerman's mail order sour cream coffee cake.

(3) You.

[Kas]

Another long time lurker, first time commenter. It's awful when you have the rug pulled out from under you like that. Nasty surprises: very bad. Happy things are:

1. The very nearly starved to death horse I bought 3 weeks ago is not only putting on weight, but is kind of happy, and loves his new shed so much that he literally runs to get in there when it starts to rain.

2. It's raining and it's cold enough to put the fire on.

3. I have two fabulous books and a big mug of very sweet tea waiting by the fire.

[Mary Scarlet]

Morning coffee and toast.
Christmas dinner with my family (with wine is usually best whee!).
A weekend evening at home with my husband.

Mare, I hope the darkness doesn't last too long. Good luck to you.

[Jenn]

1. Cinnabons
2. Fuzzy slippers and warm PJs in winter
3. My family (usually)

Very sorry it's not a happy secret.

[baby hungry man]

1. Touching my crotch and/or adjusting my package. (its a boy thing)
2. Powdered wigs and power suits.
3. Running over people who are mean to my friends in my big truck.

VROOM. VROOM. VROOM.
http://www.michiganmonstertrucks.com/m3avengerfree5.jpg

[fisher queen]

I am adding on to the animals and husbands theme:

1)bedtime, after everyone has settled down. Three boston terriers and one DH, all snoring, all letting off warmth and good sleepy smells. I pet and kiss them all until I get sleepy too.

2)morning coffee (yum) on the porch with DH and the terriers, playing catch or soccer on the lawn.

3)the way the air is fresh and smells so good in the country.

I'm cheating- I'll add one more. I like to watch the patterns that flocks of birds make in the sky.

I hope you'll find some answers in the dark part of the island.

[penelope]

Mare - sorry about the dark. Our power goes out all the time but in a weird way I kind of like it. You're a wonderful presence in the blog world and I really look forward to hearing from you.

1. Coasting on my bike down a long, long hill.
2. Cracking open a brand-new book and sniffing the pages.
3. talking to my grandmother on the phone about the state of the world, metaphysics, anatomy and good food.

hang in there dearest

[Dead Bug]

1) Not to be a copycat, but, as Pru reminded me with her comment, there is nothing like the chicken bit from Arrested Develolpment. If you don't have Arrested Development over there in Scotland, buy the Season 1 DVD on the internet. I cannot be sad when watching it.

2) Paper-thin-crust pizza margherita with fresh garlic.

3) The tourist view of Edinburgh Castle, all lit up, from down below the park at night. Spectacular.

--Bugs

[J]

Damnit, I was hoping that it was a happy secret, too. Here are some of my small joys:
-Curling up under a down comforter and beginning a new Wodehouse book
-My dogs and kitties
-Making homemade chocolate chip cookies on chilly Saturday afternoons.

I'll be here, Mare, holding your hand and bellowing "Minnie the Moocher."

[T]

I'm so very sorry it's a dark secret.

1. Wine
2. Chocolate
3. Thinking about a nice time - vacation etc..
4. Reading (esp. something that will take me away)
5. MUSIC!

I hope things turn around soon. Thinking of you.