Sunset

Ah. Whoops. I didn’t mean to disappear, Roanoke-like on you.

My idea that somehow when I went back to work after maternity leave last year that I would have more time for…well, much of anything at all- proved nothing short of delusional. With hindsight, all I can say to myself is “um, duh.” My own little inconvenient truth turned out to be that there was no time, ever.

I spent most of the past year like one of those dogs chasing her tail on the beach. I went round and round pretty much all day until I fell over, slept a little- then did it all again. Occasionally, wistfully, I would compose a blog post in my head, but I never seemed to have a chance, much less the energy to write it down. So the days went past, turning into months.

Then we decided to sell our flat and uproot the whole family to the countryside. The consequences of that decision have consumed almost an entire year and it's still not over yet- all being well, next week we will finally get into our new house after nearly three months of being between homes.  

I'd like to say I'll come back at some point and who knows, maybe it will happen. Experience has shown- never say never.

But I’d like leave with you with this in the meantime: I think we’re having a happy ending. Does the Internet permit such a thing? Because we are happy. Nothing is perfect, of course. But contrary to every expectation I ever had on the subject, I’ve come out of some very bad times entirely blessed with a lovely husband and two beautiful, bright, charming children. At the end of each whirlwind day, I watch the kids rolling around on the floor tickling each other, Botany giggling and Colt flashing his wide sweet smile at everyone. What an utterly delightful surprise he is. I am astonished on a daily basis that I ever doubted whether to having a second child. And Botany has mellowed somewhat into a sweet and kind little girl. She's terrible at listening to directions, prone to having her head in he clouds and sometimes drives us crazy; she reminds me of a lot of myself, actually.

When I was a student I was forever receiving comments from my teachers that my concluding remarks in all my essays were a bit...weak. I suppose winding things up just isn't my forte and I expect this to be no different. I will say this: I thank you all for reading, for being here with me in good times and bad- and I wish you well, until next time.

 

 

 

 

 

Comments

[Anna]

Oh Mare, how lovely to see your post. Sounds like crazy times and more big changes, but so wonderful to hear a happy "ending" (maybe just the end of the beginning, really). My younger son turns 5 next week and my own days of appointments and injecting sometimes seem long ago. But are with me forever, as well. Be happy, and all best wishes to your family x

[Christa]

So happy to hear that all it well. Would love to hear about your countryside move when (if) you get a chance.

[Melody_NC]

So happy that I kept you in my reader and get to see this wonderful update! I'm glad you got your happy ending, as a long-time reader I remember some of your darker days. I had some myself. My twins are 9 now and while I'll never forget what I went through with IF, it's nice to have that fade a bit.

I'd also love to hear more about your move to the countryside (as an American who has never lived out of my home state I've always enjoyed hearing about where you live) but I'll also understand if you don't make it back to post. Best of luck to you and your family!

[a]

That does sound like a happy ending, but I hope there's more to come here...

[jill]

Wishing you only the best Mare. Thanks for sharing your journey with us.

[Angela]

So, so happy for you.

[Sue]

It is amazing to reflect on how we have walked through those dark, confusing periods into the daily joys and trials of lovely growing families. Congrats and all the best to you and your family. Have loved reading your story all these years.

[VHMPrincess]

Wishing you the best!! Post every now and then if you have time!!!

[serina]

We will always be here just waiting to hear how you are. We are fine, thanks for asking! :-)

[Beth]

Periodically over the past year or so I have checked your blog to see if you updated. What a nice surprise to find this post today! Hope that you decide to post from time to time with updates on your life in Scotland. All the best to you.

[Kristine]

What a lovely surprise to find this post! I have checked from time to time over the past year or so, and I would even laugh and tell myself to just let you and your blog go. I hoped you and your family were well, and I am so happy to see that that is the case. I'm on the other side of IF now with three kids of my own, and your blog was one of that helped me out. As a long-time reader I can't help but wonder how things are going with E now that you've moved, and lots of other questions, but that is your business. Stay well and check back in if you get the inclination. Thanks for your words over these years.

[Sara]

Such a wonderful surprise! I'm so glad that all is well and that you are happy. That's the ending that I always hoped for. I understand perfectly how the not posting happens. I obviously did the same thing, yet I still think that maybe I'll start again, so the blog remains. I think that's OK. I hope that's OK.

[Amanda]

I decided to check your blog one last time and was thrilled to find this post. Yay for happy endings! (Or, as another poster wrote, happy beginnings.) Reading your blog helped me through my own ups and downs (including similar ambivalence over my second pregnancy that is hard to fathom now that I am enjoying my delightful 18-month old). So thank you for sharing it all, and doing so in your funny, honest, and irreverant style.

[Losh]

Often checked back to see if there was an update, so very pleased to see this! So glad that things are working out for you. May you and your family stay happy and well. Thanks for letting us know!

[Christa]

Just lovely. A yearly uptake would be fabulous!

[Teri]

Hooray for happy endings, and for unexpected updates. I am so glad to know that your family is so lovely and time consuming that you have little time for us on the internet -- but as things smooth out, if you could update us now and then it would give us joy to know that you are doing well.

[Cathy]

Yes, hooray for happy endings, Mare! Such a pleasure to read this post. I love your writing voice, so I hope you continue to write — but I do understand about finding the time, and the urge. I also have a happy family now, but I remember those years of trying, of doubting, and also of how important my blog "friends" were. (You/your blog was one!) Thank you for sharing your story, and best wishes always.